424 GENIE okay i know you genies always try to misinterpret people's wishes so i wish to be awesome at basketball. there's no way you can mess that wish up! unga munga munga moooooo you are now the best basketball player in the world... which is why the opposing teams hired a sniper to kill you! aww genies! aww man! i'm pretty good at it later how many points is the worth of a human life

423 GOATS wall of goats heeellp i'm not a goat. get me out of this goat wall/wall of goats wall of goats my name is annoying fat guy- prove that you're not a goat i... i can't think of any humanely possible way to prove that. you'll just have to trust me, annoying fat guy trust isn't in my vocabulary... but i feel it in my heart to "trust" on you. trust love

422 COMISC there were nor comics last week because i had bronchitis

421 TOASTER man waiting for the toaster takes so long when i'm just sitting here staring at it maybe i should distract myself by imagining a world of death and oblivion help ahh it burns i'm the toaster-man. toast toast toast neck toast afhggh fh my toast is ready, and i'm satisfied with my new idea of what happens when a toaster makes toast

420 ABOZZI/SKETCH #24 hey brian did you know that cactuses are covered in tiny prickly "thorns" to protect themselves heh heh what are you talking about

419 BIRTHDAY AGAIN happy birthday!! happy birthday man!! brian i can't believe you had two birthdays within a few days. is it a lie wait... where's the birthday cake? and where's chegg? soon don't worry guys i didn't eat any of it but that doesn't mean there's not a problem i really chegged things up this time guys

418 BIRTHDAY it's my birthday! yeah that's right happy birthday man and that's why no one should get mad at me for throwing up in this bowl on the table i deserve a "free pass" for that and can someone please clean up my messy bowl oh my gosh brian jeez that's disgusting puts hands in bowl haappy biiiirthdaay

417 COOKBOOK book store this looks like a good cookbook for you hmm yeah i think i'm going to buy it place money on shelf jetpack out through roof later lick lick lick lick cake i know it's not real but this is just so much easier than baking it now the pages are all weird from me licking them too much. i'm going to have to hide this book from everyone this adds a little secrecy and deception to my life, but not in a way that's fun or interesting like the things that happen on t.v. ake

416 BRAINSTORMING okay guys, let's use two random words to come up with a movie idea. the two words are "bear" and "car" what about a bear driving a card? hahahaha hilarious hahahahhahaa yeah-yeah-yes-yes uhh i don't know... the next two words are "window" and "jeans" hahaha what about a bear driving a card fred that's the 8th time you've suggested that today. i'm afraid we're going to have to fire you. how am i gonna support my family? i'm as confused as a bear driving a car over here

415 PIE-EATING CONTEST i will bear the child of whosoever wins this pie-eating contest beeegin the breeeeding match i'm gonna eat more pies no i'm gonna be the good one now where do i start, i just put one of these sluggers in my mouth right no you put it in your pants soon he took it literally i've got wet pants he did exactly what you said out of ignorance- and look at the results!

414 THE EXPRESSION "HAVE YOU LOST YOUR MARBLES??" hey daniel have you ever heard the expression "have you lost your marbles??"? it's a phrase you say when someone is acting crazy well i've been wanting to use that phrase but no one has been acting crazy enough lately i really want to say that special phrase because it's fun :) and it's a good thing to say sentences you like...... james have you lost your marbles?? that was my words

413 FROG ON THE MOON frog on the moon, frog on the mooooon sir, we need to spend the money to get that frog back from the moon. there's no life for him there. his destiny is here on earth among frog-friends? spend money? that sounds a bad, ... i think it's no you're heartless sir, with all due respect i quit and turn in my spaceman badge months later frog i've come from earth and i've brought a bunch of frog-friends, including this beautiful frog woman

412 TINY ADVENTURE oh no, through a freakish scientific accident i've been shrunk to 1/50th my normal size! time to have a freaking tiny adventure i might have to fight a cockroach or something. i think that's no big whoop oh my gosh brad has been shrunk to 1/50th his size or something! we've got to return him to normal or something! no no no! i'm on an adventure!! bffghgllghhh soon cockroach! i'm on an adventure and i know you want to fight dude... i'm pooping right now

411 SKI TRUP sorry roommates but i have to go- have to go on my super great ski vacation for a month aww so jealous you're so cool and me guy jealous too later guys time to stay in the shed for a month so they think my vacation is real one month later brian you're back with a ski-beard did your beard get all wet and sloppy in the snow i have confidence in my secret and my friends think my "ski trip" was a cool thing

355 FRIENDS BRIAN CACTUS hey david since you are world famous for your impressions i told all these guys named brian you would do an impression of a cactus for them okay ragghghgfffffffffffff brian brian brian brian okay david... heh heh heh! now how about an impression of a dog ruff ruff gimme some dog food ruff ruff brian brian brian brian

354 ROAD SIGN hey brian what does that road sign mean that's a snake crossing sign. that means you have to drive completely straight without turning so you don't hit any snakes soon wait brian the road is turning. brian we have to turn or we'll go off the road. brian!!! brian watch out. oh... my... gosh. brian!!! turn turn bam guys, come on. didn't you read the sign no no going to die

353 MOTORCYCLE david ahhh!!! david come check out my parrot it repeats everything i say check it out parrots are dumb parrots are dumb well i think parrots are cool

352 SLINKY hey james have you ever seen what happens when you put a slinky on a staircase? no why don't you show me blegghghh that's what happens

351 SAVANNAH nothing like hanging out in the jungles i mean savannahs of africa right dave ;) definitely robert, hey what do you think of my tiger drawing dave tigers don't look like that, that's the ugliest tiger i've ever seen

350 BILLBOARD anyways bill i think you should get a billboard to promote your business you said billboard and my name is bill should i make a joke about that 3 months later hey bill what's up not much i'm sooo bored bill bored

349 HAMBURGERS greg vs. hamburger. round one. let the battle begin greg you've got to stop having these hamburger tournaments looks like another win for greg chomp chomp next contestant!!!!!!!! right here jason is that you? what the heck are you doing in that hamburger costume heh heh yeah i'm gonna teach greg to pick on someone his own size later hey greg i'm back how was that last fight that hamburger looked pretty big heh heh

348 CHAIRS ha ha i coated all my chairs in iron and now they are so heavy that when anyone tries to pick them up they just pull themselves to the ground hey jason so what was the business you took care of while you sent me to the mall (for two days) you can sleep anywhere you want in there as long as they don't find you as long as they don't find you well let me tell you eric pick up that chair and come sit down with me over here ungghh ungghh

347 DOGS hey david have you ever heard the phrase "it's a dog eat dog world" yeah whyyyyyy yyyyyyyyyyyyyyy david this is a nightmare in a world without dog food. this is what will happen if you keep eating all the dog food no nooo no no nooo wait here's some dog food, here little buddy eat this dog food dog food dog food

346 CUPCAKE PRINTER with the latest technology cupcake printer you just find your favorite cupcake picture and it prints out a real cupcake heh heh let's try it out now how to use computer?? click click click click push oh no kevin that's not a picture of a cupcake that's a picture of a fat guy print print print print blgghghghgfff murrrrrrrrrr

345 CELL PHOOONE man robert keeps trying to get me to eat my cell phone by coating it in a thin sugary glaze meanwhile well doctor, my greatest fear is being eaten alive just a sec i'm getting a phone call ring ring ring chomp chomp crunch chomp chomp crunch chomp nooooo cruunch pllff who are you talking to? is that your boyfriend do you have a boyfriend

344 TEXT MESSAGE hey rex come take a look at this text message my name rooocks sarah sent me a text message and i think she meant to say "sweet dreams" but it says "sweat dreams" stopped caring about this later nightmare no. noooo. this is sweat dreams

343 BIRTHDAY CAKE birthday cake installation team here........ where would you like this birthday cake installed riiiiight heeeere brandon no i'm having that birthday cake installed behind this wall so that whenever anybody mentions cake i can knowingly glance at the wall later anyways then we got a cake from the store... knowing glance craaack cruunch

342 DOG i shredded my dog what... what do you mean i shredded my dog up. this meat grinder box is so misleading meat grind hey that puppy looks like he's having fun, maybe my dog can try... see, that's how it happened to me later hey so did you make sure not to shred your dog up

341 BEAR ATTACK ahhh!! ahhh!! i can't believe i was attacked by a bear aghgh nooo david don't worry i'm taking you to the best bear doctor in town as soon as i figure out which of these pedals makes car go soon okay david this guy is the best bear doctor around trust me!!! that's not a bear doctor it's a bear doctor david calm down it's aghghghgh chomp what the heck is going on in my office?! a real doctor! help me please chomp

340 TRASH don't tell me what you see in there... if i'm gonna eat from this trash can i don't want to know what's in it but greg there's definitely some glass in there i can eat some glass greg why don't you just take the trash out you don't need to eat it i'm lazy why do you think i've been laying on the floor just out of range of this candy bar for so long when i want a candy bar so bad okay greg i'm going to put this candy bar on that table over there so you can stop staring at it

339 DOG CHAIR hey greg "check it out" i taught my dog what chairs are so now when i tell him to sit he just looks around confused because there are no chairs around sit ??? really david it just sounds like you couldn't teach him to sit and then lied about your dog being able to sit in a chair later time to try on my new sunglasses

338 FRUIT HATS hey dave i invented fruit hats how am i gonna eat this apple when it is so personable? well dave, first you're gonna have to become a cannibal, then when you don't care about eating people any more you probably won't care about eating an apple with a hat later cannibal i've obliterated countless human lives bohhh yeah but that apple still looks so charming

337 DOG GAMESHOW welcome to the hot fun gameshow "find the dead dog in a pile of sleeping dogs" "................... find the dead dog in a pile of sleeping dogs" my strategy is to cuddle with the dog to measure how much love is emanating from its heart... this pup iz dead soon you found the dead dog. your prize is an artist's rendition of you in a high-action skateboard scene but you don't really even care about it because you're going to the movies later

336 SPIKE SUIT hey darren what have you been up to not much i've just been killing lions and sharks by wearing a spike suit and letting them eat me whaaa nature's motto is "eat or be eaten, or be eaten in a spike suit" later spike suuuuit

335 CAT see i trained my cat so that when i stand up a picture of a cat he runs through it then i give him a cat treat..... and now whenever he sees a real cat he just runs at it and rams it head on and they both fall down i need to get it on this cat treat thing uhh so i just ram my face into a cat's face and i'll get one of those kitty treat things? james i don't think you're understanding this at all doh doh doh doh wheres my snacks

334 CLOTHING hey jeremy i have been buying clothing that is both informative and informative hugs go here sock not wearing shoes yet "informative and informative"? i see you haven't been using that thesaurus i bought you for john's birthday oh hey john jeremy i wanted to ask you about that why did you get him a thesaurus for my birthday because i know you already have a good vocabulary oh okay i forgive u hugs hugs heyyyy!!!! hugs go here

333 DOUBLE DAMAGE whoa man i just got a power-up in this video game that makes my character do double-damage! what if you could get double damage in real life????????? high five double damage according to our measurements you sat on that chair twice as hard as normal... you can thank double damage for that. thanks chair scientists, as an reward you can have this solar-powered ***calculator*** later this calculator is powered by the sun but i'm a scientist and i don't like to go outside double damage crush double cry

332 KEYBOARD hey dave, it's sam. how are you today? i got rid of the "q" key on my keyboard and created a new key feels good chat james99: how does it feel to have a new puppy feels good chat james99: how does it feel to know there's so much suffering and there's nothing you can do about it feels good okay sam quit horsin' around... give me your extra "q" key so i can make a keyboard that only has the letter q on it later chat davedave: qqqqqqqqq chat davedave: qqqqqqqqq sam123: feels good

331 BABYFINDER oh man me and that girl both have blue eyes we have something in common... something we can talk about forever because we can both relate!!! soon yeah blue is a cool color yeah i like blue too oh no!!!!!! i've got to think of something to say a.s.a.p. i like... when i remember... crayons blue

330 BLUE EYES oh man me and that girl both have blue eyes we have something in common... something we can talk about forever because we can both relate!!! soon yeah blue is a cool color yeah i like blue too oh no!!!!!! i've got to think of something to say a.s.a.p. i like... when i remember... crayons

329 SOOOOAAP hey dave do you ever wonder why soap smells so good but tastes so bad? heh yeah... soap tastes really bad... suds suds whoa and look i just found a bar of soap here in the dirt hmm if soap is dirty what do you clean it with? soap soap "cleans your dirty soap" soap soap soap ????????

328 MEDALS hey dave-o i just got back from the medal store and also i just started adding "o" to the end of people's names. i think it's cool! medal store? let me see thsoe 1st place "in a general standard competition" 2nd place "but it still feels like you won really big" vampire "you're a deadly yet compassionate vampire" tim-o you can't just buy medals they don't mean anything that way hmm he called me tim-o he's cool too

327 PUPPY/SPORTS ever since puppies evolved to be able to change into soccer balls it has caused nothing but trouble poof hey! no hands on the ball mom why did you hire this referee to be our nanny he's the only one that would let me pay them in cupcakes did someone say cupcakes? because that would be a home run

326 LASER DAY 2010: INTERNET hey james whatcha doing "whatcha"??? i'm just browsing online baby forums online baby forums baby chat posted monday, june 24, 20 tommy goo goo ga ga robert plsshppbt well we're about to play laserball you should come play okay osted monday, june 24, 2010 <--- check it out

325 LASER DAY 2010: MOOON hmm the moon is orbiting pretty close this daser day i better warn my tall friends turn something bad into something good later man i hit my head on the moon. i thought this kind of stuff would stop happening once i retired from being an astronaut previously trip anyways i'm wearing this hat to cover the bruise so no one thinks i got beat up someone beat me up

324 LASER DAY 2010: LASER BANDANA laser bandanas are all the rage don't misspell bandana john i've walked around your head three times and i don't see the back of your bandana. i'm pretty sure it's just a headband what am i gonna do david headbands are out of style and i glued it on. (i made a commitment to coolness) previously one bottle of glue with every headband one glitter marker with every classic painting

323 HANDCAT handcat that's handcat okay dave this is an important business deal. we better shake hands on it. close your eyes and shake my hand that's a pleasure for me. let me finish applying this handshake cream heh heh heh hand cat

322 PLANE robert i spilled honey all over the flight controls and now the bear is flying the plane dave calm down, where's the bear emergency manual bear emergency manu how to eat books attention passengers this is your captain with an important message- "rawr." oh no look he changed the in-flight movie to that girl movie about two friends who are each getting married but they get stranded on a desert island maybe there is such a thing as pure animal ferocity i want pink flowers for my wedding no i want pink flowers for my wedding no me

321 PUPPY NOVELS i'm tired of reading all these puppy novels he thought he heard something outside or something like that, and he knew now was the time to show his true courage and bark a lot "i saw a little thing crawl under the counter," jonathan remarked casually. "i think it was bad" later hmm now that i've read all the puppy novels i think this one is the best. time to make it into a full feature movie later pupman hmm now that i can change into a man i can eat all the good food i want pllpghfhff blllrrrr bllrrghgghhgh hot dog in the movie theater thumbs up

320 PUPPY LOVE on today's episode we are hiding a bunch of puppies in a puppy-hater's house so he can have a change of heart later finally home from a long day at the cereal-mart. wait why is there a puppy coming out from under the couch aww bananas there's one on my ceiling fan too sniff fan sniff suprirse! welcome to our show derrick, do you have puppy love now? yeah wait, where's the puppy that was hiding in the cupboard chomp chomp chomp is this food town

319 ORGANS punch!!! say it buddy! say it right now! okay okay i'll say it "i'm having a heart attack" do you like my joke i'm an appendix and i'm the only organ without an important function and that makes me feel sad sometimes

318 GREETING CARD hey mr. johnson here's my new greeting card design don't worry it'll be okay now, the bear looks too sick to attack. it will never be able to hurt you my name is doctor james phillips, and i'll return this bear to perfect health if it's the last thing i do good job robert, now we just need to write the little price numbers on the back soon 2.99 this is the hardest part

317 SLIDES hey james check it out i bought a slide. the slide part is gone though so it's pretty much just a ladder so this is what it's like to have a horrible life hey james i bought another slide, this one has the part you slide on but it doesn't have a ladder ungghh you're bad the next day hey james check it out i bought a third slide and this one literally doesn't even exist not sliding made me sick

316 BORED fun things to do -ride a jet ski -start a book club -end a book club -book club memories ronnofish i'm booored ronnofish bop bop a-doo i'm up for anything- as long as you don't say we should go fishing. unghhgghh more fun things to do -try to get your friends to solve a mystery when they are tired

315 CONNECT-THE-DOTS connect-the-dots connect-the-dots bear eats worm-man hey dave come see the connect-the-dots picture i just drew james you know ever since my laser eye surgery i can't see things i don't care about previously okay dave we're ready to start the laser eye surgery zap zap zap zap pew pew

314 AN ISLAND cannibal island you are what you eat dad a boy at school took my lunch money and ate my arm, and ate my lunch money my son is a wuss later little wuss here son i built you a new robot arm whoa what does little wuss mean little wuss sounds cool

313 PORTRAITS your portraits of old people apathetically busting through walls are really catching on has anybody seen the remote control, or the other remote control thank you robert i just... at some point in my youth i lost the confidence to determine if milk has spoiled bam! oh no i forgot that everyone who draws a picture of something has it happen to them later in real life. i forgot that like happens now for some reason elsewhere me cool car soon oh man it worked. but in the drawing i'm the one in the car time to kill my close once and for all

312 PARTY so i tie ropes to your house, then i tie the other ends of the ropes around random people on the street and they have to follow the ropes to your party tonight sounds good, make sure to get some babes later dave what have you done, the only people that came to my party are fat guys and they're eating all my bowls of chocolate opps chocolate arm chocolate arm lick lick

311 T.V. SHOOOOWS hey dave what's up i'm just watching that show about the tiny guy that holds onto puppy tails whooooaaaah wag wag whoooaaahhhhh wag wag that was a happy puppy. eight out of ten. clap clap applause clap this is the life aww man it's over. now that show is coming on where the guy pretends he's stuck in your t.v. with a pterodactyl help please, i have a family, i don't want to be in here forever sckreeeeeeeeeeee no

310 VACATIONS hey james fancy seeing you on vacation here too, what have you been up to? well i've been making my own dictionary, can you think of any words that start with "B" yes-bearstruction bearstruction- the amount of destruction a bear causes i let a bear housesit for me meanwhile if i keep crushing these cracker crumbs you won't be able to see them anymore- now that's what i'm talking about the carpet never feels the same

309 PUPPY puppy armor puppy armor puppy armor hey pup-pup come here! attention? for me?? i've got an important job for you wag that tail benny make sure he has no doubt wag wag i need you to eat this puppy treat... pronto! i'm a good puppy and i deserve this chomp chomp chomp

308 OCEAN washing giant dishes in the soap ocean is a tough job but it's not like they can wash themselves my self esteem... these stupid plates can't wash themselves these dishes aren't gonna clean themselves i don't like this plate's sense of taste or personality duh duh dave... suh suh soap shark!! cleanliness is the only way soap shark sean think fast- the only way to stop the soap shark is to drink the entire ocean gulp gulp gulp it tastes soapy

307 B-BALL derrick now! take your hat off and shoot the ball! buzz! that's it, you got the ball in the hoop. that makes you the winner but what about the other team derrick, derrick, derrick. they were just 'bots built to test your mettle on the court. now they'll go back to being regular kitchen applicances- from your kitchen!!

306 LIGHT SWITCH man it's dark in here i'm gonna turn the light on flip wait rob not a light switch that's the bear cage switch what??? click unlock aww man seriously, you let that cat in that always sits on my foot

305 DOORWAY monster doorway oh nooo hey james what's up oh man it's you, ever since i put this "monster doorways" sign on my front door i keep getting scared when people come in ragghghgghghggh come on monster this is here for a reason oh wow i feel like such an idiot

304 T.V. SHOWS hey james have you seen that new show about a lion making excuses to eat its prey hey antelope don't you owe me like ten dollars what don't you owe me like ten dollars for something ryan you know my television is at sea next: serious conversations with babies okay baby robert today i want to discuss the significance of a mother's affection well this is a very important topic to me because i love my mommy

303 TINY PERSON a tiny person why won't anyone play limbo with meeee hey little guy. i have a problem where i teleport into people's bedrooms. what's up? not you that's for sure no one will ever hear my joke in a sad rage i just invented moon glasses to get that hot moon glare out of your eyes in the deep of night let me try laser

302 TEST okay class you may start the test zack, i'm pretty sure there's only one bear in the whole world think about it, have you ever seen two bears in the same place at the same time? dave quiet i'm trying to take this test test zack 1. circle the bear: test zack 1. circle the bear test zack 1. circle the bear later test a+

301 CAAATS this is where you put the cat in then it comes out the other side the cat chute. transportation has never been easier for a man and his cat i'm a man and i like the sound of that. i'll take it... how does money sound? flex flex later hey alex it's tim. do you have that cat i need for the next meeting sure do, i'll send it over right now. check your cat chute later and that's why this business model will bring success throughout the year cat? yes

300 DERR DERR adventures of derr derr and the exploding hat boom drrrrrrrr derr derr please help that guy stole my right eye. quick!! der der der put your head against his belly----> make your hat explode boom derr derr you did it now my eye is as good as new. now i can travel to ;the land of monsters to the right of you' on a quest to save my father your eye looks kinda weird man!! problem solve

299 TALKING ON PHONE i hate you jennifer. haaaaaate. what?? what the heck i didn't say that but i heard it come out of the phone what is wrong with my phone wait this isn't a phone it's a little guy he told jennifer i hate her because he is subversive please help me... i deserve to live a normal life in this society your function is determined by your size and you are phone-size stop! i am the obese society-changing man. i will run around the block to magically make this society more fair to everyone hfff hff nevermind nevermind nevermind

298 PUPPIES so basically i cover myself with velcro, roll around a bit in the puppy store, then all the puppies get stuck to me sorry not paying attention, reading a book about getting puppies stuck to you by wearing a bunch of velcro der der der der that's a big adventure for such little puppies stuck to arm ? ? ? ? what will my new life be like??? later hey dave your velcro shirt is inside-out yip yip ruff ruff... super bark. "whopps" let me fix it real quick there how does it look now ? ? ?

297 MURDER WEEK COMIC #2: DOOR time to try out my newfound power to walk through unlocked doors *gasp* you found my murder!!! ohhh... my life! a murderer and a murderee?? umm... right here. right here is where the murder hurts the most

296 MURDER WEEK COMIC #1: A STRANGLING this man was strangled detective what do you think hmm be on the lookout for someone with really strong hands that he could use to strangle someone we could have a strong hands contest and give the winner our own brand of justice later strong hands contest hmm where the heck did my soda go ron wow detective you missed it one of the contestants crushed a can of soda with his bear hands my soda

295 MATTRESSES man i can't believe i didn't get any sleep last night. time to go to work at the mattress store later, at the mattress store zzz zzzz benjamin what are you doing we need to sell some mattresses here. these mattresses ain't gonna sell themselves zzzz zzz people what are you doing at the insomnia clinic my job is literally filled with beds here come on esses insomnia benjamin i don't know what you did but business is booming!!!! listen boss are you gonna let me take a nap now or what

294 SODA BOTTLE dave why have you been carrying that soda bottle around all day? stop right there but my sentence was already over. sorry to interrupy but i am carrying this soda around just in case the world will end if it touches anything besides my hand gulp gulp boom dave what have you done the world is destroyed and all the pieces are flying out into space the universe. we are ready for it. enter code online for 10 points: hfgos-xctl-pqjf-dgixr

293 CEREAL listen robert you put anything in a bowl with milk and it's automatically cereal. the prerequesites are filled out james that's no excuse for eating my mp3 player!! wait i think i hear one of my songs playing from your stomach do you believe in the magic of a ghost and if so does it scare you bad-ly robert what the heck is this horrible music i have a date in eight minutes date in eight

292 FUTURE sweet, i travelled from 2007 to the futre! everything i loved isn't cool anymore excuse me, um, present-day normal person. are towels still cool? no way! what's cool is towel towel bears they are genetically engineered to attack wet people until they are dry and they have no mouth or claws to hurt them fffff fffff finally dry. maybe my wife will love me again? listen towel towel bear, i know you're not happy here and so the adventure begins 2007

291 JOGGING aww man people are gonna think i'm afraid of babies because this baby always chases me while i'm jogging what am i gonna do?? now that's how you kill a baby! okay baby come on let's go hey baby-hating john look what i've got wow greg you are not a very good friend to me at all

290 ROOM whoo i have to go to the bathroom, better barge into every door until i find it wait jim don't go in tehre! oh my gosh don't go in that room! stop it! don't do it. jim don't go in there okay welcome... welcome to the room that time forgot! what the heck there's just one dinosaur in here and i seriously doubt you've even been in this room for 65 million years bleghh blughh but jim check this out- a penny from 1995 this really is the room that time forgot!! later

289 CHEESEBURGERS i heard if you give a hippo rabbit a cheeseburger you can find out what sound it makes. let's find out the hippo rabbit absorbs the cheeseburger absorb absorb absorb now that i brought you a cheeseburger let me hear what sound you make more cheeseburgers, please

288 FANS ceiling fan college is great. i'm learning so much about ceiling fan college hey i want a chair i know what you students think all day: "we get chairs and the teacher doesn't." that's why i invented the legless chair for standing people now who here wants to get a good grade in this class pow

287 TELEVISION oh hey jenny i'm just watching that show about what everyday objects would be like if they came to life i want someone to sit on me... right now! that's what i need! turn me to open this door! turn me to open this door! shut it cyclops, my favorite show "fat guy in a house with no food" is about to come on

286 GOOD LUCK CARD hmm these new good luck cards for people you don't know really "hit the cake" that's a new phrase i just made up that means it's as good as punching a cake into your own mouth pow! good luck next time you sit in a chair. i don't know you too well but most people sit in chairs from time to time. -dave dave this card is not appropriate don't you know about this chair that is always constantly about to hit me any minute now

285 COOKIE i'll take one of those free cookies please free cookies zero now it's time for the cookie test: eating. if it tastes good i'll travel back in time to this moment and eat it again time portal are you my future self come to eat this cookie? i am your future self, but there's no time for the cookie. you have five minutes to save the world! here, take this jetpack there's always time for a cookie chomp chomp boom

284 SPORTS if tennis had goals goal!! finally, a satisfying conclusion to tennis. let's go home do you think the world will remember us football fishing there must be more where this came from

283 MAILBOX what the heck why did someone send me a picture on my mailbox flipped over guess you don't need a picture because your mailbox is right there huh prank titan!! they didn't see me do it. must mean i didn't do it. later welcome to the newspaper, now on t.v. our top story is prank titan's new catch phrase which is catching on all over the nation wow john that was a very good job now where's my candy bar?? later murder club they didn't see me do it. must mean i didn't do it. come on danny we're all murderers here, why don't you tell me about your murder and evidence lumpy shirt secret police hat

282 BIOENGINEERING finally my new animal has been created- the helium fish float float dead. float float aww man i made another animal that auto-dies whoa james did you say auto-dice? did you finally invent automatic dice? well dave the good news is that i rolled a six but the other dice only rolled a two also someone named stacy called like an hour ago i told her you were out stacy broke my heart! i never want to talk to her again, auto-dice! no dave i made another animal that auto-dies like the bears that explode when they touch a rabbit previously bear explode sweet like carrots

281 SUNGLASSES oh man i should not have gotten these sunglasses with an image of a parachuting bear at the top of the lens first-person sunglasses view but whenever i take my sunglasses off the sun bothers me sun oh man that guy isn't wearing sunglasses

280 EVERYONE HAS A LITTLE BADFACE IN THEM take my advice badface, you're never gonna get a sweet lips kiss with a face as bad as that face but the lips kiss is what i was shooting for i put the scorpion on there to kill the spider, and the spider on there to bite me whenever i get scared previously ragghrr ahhh ahhh bite do you know what it's like to be scared of being scared just carry this football around and girls will think you're cool

279 MOSTLY UNDERGROUND the underelephant always makes you feel great eyes sparkle now you know elephants have teeth because you were never 100% sure underelephant makes it so that parachute goes up parachute goes up next time you have an awkward moment, i want you to think of me later awkward moment boom now this isn't awkward it's just crazy

278 CLICK CLICKS david david david, let me tell you about triple-clicking it's like double-clicking, but it really gets your point across first you click once. that's the first click. the second click is coming soon rob don't be silly, i get all my information from cabinets high five or no??? the latest news, weathers, and sparts right here. no clicking needed/allowed/necessary latest sparts news: dodgeball exists hmm where can i get a cabinet? sells for too much money? later, rob triple-clicks a rab in real life click click click

277 GAMEZ gregory this box doesn't have pizza in it anymore... but the legacy lives on! . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . remember the pizza so are we still having that gaming session tonight? you know what i'm talking about. video games. hmm?? for sure. i bought the new video game "gamer boyz". it's a simulation of playing video games later oh man your size-screen t.v. makes my eyes go "goo goo ga ga" "flip flip flippin' out!!!" my character's fun meter is off the charts "flip flip flippin' out!!!"

276 BOXES 4EVER so demigarld i've been thinking a lot about ways to keep this box from crawling around while i'm out at golf practice practice practice ungh ungh previously okay time to practice how to practice practicing golf remember practice practice makes practice practice practice silent agreement about excitement for the golf practice tournament bggh bggh lllungh lllungh my instincts tell me life shouldn't be so horrible fold fold gahhh blghhh grflgrfllfngh fold fold

275 CHAIRS AND STUFF sorry bragidald but it's over. our relationship. okay bragidald, if you flip over a card higher than the number five you win 0 0 the zero of hearts but what about those two cheap and expensive chairs i bought you that's stupid, bragidald. i can only sit in one chair at a time previously

274 MILK? okay milky, you ready to live up to your name? why does he always say that to me when he buys milk here we go milky, which one of these milks is number one? which of these milks could make you quit your job and get another job because the good taste confused you actually doughnutface i don't really know much about milk shh! that's not my name anymore milky, i follow the spirit of the muffin now and what do you mean you don't know about milk you wrote that essay on milk wrong again muffinheart i just spilled milk on my essay about diagrams previously here you can read an essay about diagrams and here you can see a diagram about essays and here's a pie chart of a pie pie chart 100% pie do i look at the pointer or the thing you're pointing at currently dang milky i thought you were more into milk than i thought... than i thought that night milk. i love it.

273 DOUBLE BEAR ronald henry george you've tied two bears together, what have you done you got one of my three names wrong again rooaarrr graaarr you get that side, i'll get this side meanwhile that trip to space was great, even if we did forget to bring the letter b in our magnetic alphabet. isn't that right bobobaba? bobobaba, this isn't the earth we once loved--- back to space!

272 VOLCANOES do u believe in volcanoes hmm... boom! jim, stop what you're thinking because i have a new thought. volcanoes are the earth's microwaves also i came up with a name for tiny waves in the ocean: microwaves later was she talking about volcanoes or the ocean because i brought my swim trunks and i want to have fun

271 WALL WALL heh camouflaging myself as jim's wall was the purr-fect disguise my smarts are cat-astrophic soon hey jim, i like cats a home is an important foundation in a person's life and i am proud to be a part of it literally wall??? stupid fortune cookie your wall isn't going to talk to you and chocolate tastes bad let's just calm down for a sec hey! chocolate is delicious! chocolate is so good! hey! you hear what i'm saying about chocolate bub? cindy if you were made of chocolate i wouldn't hesitate to eat you alive are you breaking up with me no i just really want a candy bar

270 BREAKFAST super mega is on a break no one has any concern for my psychological condition- which is i want some candy!!!!!!!! hmm the moon is orbiting pretty close today i better warn my tall friends turn something bad into something good b-turn only oh noooooo!!

269 RUG hmm i've been hiding these cookies under the rug for quite a while. now if a wizard turns me into a bug i'll know exactly where to go for a cookie buffet jim do you know what the floor has been so crunchy lately? it makes me feel like i'm destroying the world as i walk around the house even when i go do laundry i feel like i'm destroying the world mary mary mary... have you ever seen a movie that had a wizard in it? have you taken the necessary precautions? actually i've been tying a banana to the dog's tail just in case i get turned into... a monkey? one banana for a lifetime as a monkey??? hmm is it part of me or do i eat it

268 SINK oh dang my little bear is going down the sink millenia of evolution that gave me predisposed instincts in the wild... could not prepare me for this! i learned how to catch fish in the raging rapids any fish in the sink?

267 ISLAND brad, if you could take any three things with you to a deserted island what would they be i would bring a pen, a notebook, and a roller coaster. so begins the book "roller coaster island" i would bring the question itself: "what would you bring to the island" then i would bring you, brad, to ask the question to over and over again wait, where is this boat going

266 TOY DINOSAUR so it turns out this toy dinosaur is the center of the universe the cosmos beckoning at the command of... a children's ball? greg greg get it right- this ball is in the shape of a dinosaur. whoa whenever you move it towards me i can feel my molecules rearranging and my molecules have never rearranged before. i guess you could say... there's a first time for rearranging? ????


264 LASER DAY 2008: IT'S A LASER HAMMER< laser high five! fwoo fwoo fwoo fwoo fwoo oscillate i have free will to do what i want but i choose to oscillate

263 LASER DAY 2008: IT'S LASER DAY i've got my laser hammer and i'm ready to get some work done boom i. hate. nails.

262 WHALE aww man a whale washed up in my driveway whale idea movie theater hey do you guys offer discounts for whale? yes, as long as you don't throw it through the movie screen soon

261 TABLE oh man rachel, unfolding this table was way too complicated. something isn't quite right htough greg! the table tricked you into being the table and it being the human i hate it when tables try to switch societal roles i am a true human. give me a steak and a bottle of soda bottle don't worry you two, my name is brett brett. i manufactured these living tables and have been traveling around the country to destroy them i want my money back

260 BRACHIOSAURUS thanks for the application brian, but right now our brachiosaurus department is pretty full but sir with all due respect some of the people working in that department aren't even brachiosauruses meanwhile well right now i'm just going to use your application to weight down an ancient monster to keep it from terrorizing the world why are these job applications so heavy. what were they applying for a heavy paper company heavy paper inc. i've almost got this life insurance form filled out for my cat on heavy paper buh buh buh buh boooo

259 DOOR do not enter enter do not enter hmm what should i do enter

258 SCREENSAVER haha that "flying forward through space" screensaver is an oldie but a goodie. i wish i could fly through space forever captain red alert someone moved the mouse you made it! oh my gosh jim check this out we finally made it to saturn on the screensaver. don't press anything! h n m 9 o p

257 UNTITLED see, the thing about sentences you don't finish is... haha i get it! this is going to be the best standup comedy ever later and why do they call it the "yolk" of an egg? why not call it.......... the gargaloo?? yes! gargaloo?? gargaloo??? hahahahaha!!!

256 HAT STORE welcome to the prank show "the hat in a hat store that is actually a pair of pants" uh oh folks, looks like someone is approaching the so-called "hat"!

255 CALENDAR your "puppies on top of other animals" calendar is so cute! june can we go a little faster....... please??? augu how did i get myself into this mess!! much cuter than your decapitation calendar decembe the holidays are so stressful!

254 PHONE CALLS hey i'm trying to call a wrong number but i keep getting people i already know dan is that you? my artificial arm is powered by awkward moments. if i don't get a wrong number soon i could lose it forever hey man you still there? say, how's that giraffe i sold you?

253 BEAR thosterson get in here. there's a bear trying to get out of the wall again grrarrrr putting all those bears in the walls wasn't such a good idea, despite the bear salesman's advice previously bear stor if you buy a bear, then later in the evening you will have already bought it as time goes on the moment you bought the bear will seem further and further away sir did you ask for me? thosterson! nevermind about the bear. i need you to get me a live rabbit or fish for me to devour. later copy machine

252 A BABY we will name the baby "scientists collaborate" it's important or else the new technologies will never be discovered 30 years later scientists collaborate, where did you leave the mop. i dropped a cancerous tumor on the floor then spilled the cure for cancer all over it. i guess that's how it goes being a scientist i left the mop in the center of a grand labyrinth guarded by a fierce dragon. we will have to work together if we want to get it back. another opportunity for scientists to collaborate later now that we have worked together to conquer that maze you have truly lived up to your name of "scientists collaborate". now it's time for me to live up to my name of "decide whether or not to feed a cow a hamburger" hmmmm

251 BANANA YES man it's good being a banana. top of the food chain. time to find some prey to eat up with my banana lips and teeth ahhhh noooo oh my gosh the tables have turned! shuffle jump turn

250 TATTOOOOTTAT hey man check out the new target tattoo on my arm noticed it there the other day fwing arrow owwee ouch! ouch! i say. have you seen my arrow sir? arrow golfing i have been, and you appear to be a gentle man who might know some assistance oh it's right on target i see. that's two million points later twirl twirl me? two million points?

249 LEG tied a ghost to your leg! ahhh!! wait, a ghost mustache? everyone knows mustaches can never die hospital his heart has failed but the mustache is still pumping blood through his body okay you got me, this ghost disguise was actually just a blanket. in actuality i am a mattress a mattress with a blanket on! got me again! earlier ghost!

248 CAR SEATS the secret world of car seats after you leave the car woo ga ga goo goo marfalo my car seat brother, let's throw up all over ourselves uggghh blughbleeghh the humans will never know, and we'll finally be skinny enough to go to the car seat promenade later car seat promenade oh marfalo, you're so thin and fit marfalo

247 TAG tag! you're "it" in the biggest game of tag the world has ever seen in other news today greg is it in world tag. stay away! you can see that look in his eyes news later uhh actually greg i don't think we should hang out tonight. my girlfriends said you might tag me. i've gotta trust my girls no matter how ugly i wish they were uhh sorry greg, no bro fives today. maybe we should just wave hey greg. good to wave to you bro. waves don't have a climax so i'll just stop. that look in his eyes i want to tag you bro

246 SCIENTISTS oh sweet lord of the scientists, we beckon you because we don't know what font size to print our research paper in scilence did he say silence or science? i don't know man i'm doing a test to see if this rabbit is a bear just in case later bear test *positive* aww man i can't believe i'm a bear my wife is gonna kill me hello rabbit husband. today i have truly lived up to my name of bear-eating monster

245 BATTERIES hmm i got these batteries for my remote control ... but who's to say my remote gets to have all the fun t.v.! change to... the ghost channel? boooo k

244 TAQUITOS according to my notes shrinking myself so i could live inside a tacquito was not a good idea hey there neighbor my name is fred i live on top of that french fry over there french fry? so low class yes um neighbor i'm sure you do. i am going to avoid you man this neighborhood is lame, i'm going to shrink myself even more later hey neighbor my name is blublox i live at that electron over there that's cool, want to go hang out over there no my house moves at unimaginable speeds

243 DOG OR BEAR welcome to the dog or bear awards! dog or bear? so what do you think terrence... dog or bear? well i feel like it wants to cuddle with me, but i also feel like that would be a trick to eat me oh it's happened before with a hungry girlfriend or two to test whether it's a dog or bear, i'm going to show it a full-length movie called "dog and bear" and see which character it seems to like the most later bear, we've got to find shelter from the storm grraarrr a bear doesn't hide from a storm rrriiipp!! punch!!

242 CATS man fred, why did you teach the other cat to talk. he is so stupid fred, i've got to admit the hair soup wasn't as good as i thought it would be. next i want to try wall pie nooooo!! aww man you taught the wall to talk too? yeah i taught it to talk, but i didn't teach it the letter g hey wall, say "grass" rass! rass! rass! rass!

241 VACATION i forgot where we're going on vacation we're going to a secret overworld that exists ten feet above the ground think about it man, how often are you ten feet above the ground. obviously there is a secret world up there here's an ignorancy token for not knowing later ignorancy slot machine one token to play lot machi i don't know if you won

240 CRAYONS aww man i'm so sick of this ghost haunting my box of crayons the voices of a thousand souls beckon you to choose the green crayon crayon aww man i can't color saturn grass with a green crayon. i'll be the laughing stock of interplanet class later now james i'm nothing more than an interplanet professor, but if saturn had grass no way it would be green it would probably be a color to match the fur of a creature on the planet- perhaps the mythical jungabear. the mythical jungabear seems kind at first, but kills its prey after it teaches them the alphabet hey man do you want to learn the alphabet i already know it dang i don't know if that counts

239 CHIP CHIPS so chip, how do you like the potato chip party? more chips! hey chips! gimme that chip! my chip! covered in goo? i should not have come man. i should not have come to a party with food that has my name hey chip! what's up man! what's up man hey man chips awkward

238 COOKIE CUTTER finally my rabbit cookie cutter is here later sweet! my rabbit instincts are telling me to snuggle under that bush. a rabbit just knows these things oh well would i imagine that a little rabbit hiding behind a bush don't worry little buddy it just so happens i accidentally bought rabbit food instead of a house today earlier how many square feet does this house have how many square feet? square feet? uhh... well

237 GROCERIES hmm, i don't remember writing eucalyptus leaves on my grocery list groceries oranges corn yogurt eucalyptus leaves okay guys, who added eucalyptus leaves to my grocery list must have been steve no, i just wrote "this is a piece of paper" on the back i've been labeling everything in preparation for my appearance on the game show "what is that thing" this is my face later what is that thing okay steve, final bonus question... what is that thing connected to your arm that you grab things with? hmmm buy me some koala food

236 MILK waiter, you didn't have to give me my milk in... the world's widest cup meanwhile grape-loving horse, why is the ground milk? i thought we were supposed to be at lemonade an hour ago clearly this map has led us astray groceries bread lemonade soda pie pl where the grapes at

235 CHIPS mary, i think this guy has been stocking me stalking you? no, stocking me. at the grocery store next to the potato chips chips so what's up potato chips chi we're not potato chips, we're bags. the potato chips are inside chip help us! help we're trapped help but potato chips as soon as you get out someone's gonna eat you chi whaaat? later man gary i don't know what's up i got some potato chips at the grocery store today and they were so panicky and my sandwich seemed really mad at me earlier

234 CELL PHONE oliver and the talking cell phone hey larry listen i just got fired and i was wondering oh yes, i'm larry. not your cell phone talking to you. i'm larry good good that's what i like to hear i think it's important everyone remembers their name luh luh luh luh larry? that's my name, don't wear it out... to a restaurant! wear some clothes instead that's what clothes are for, am i right? real larry is so funny

233 TATTOOS my new bear tattoo is number one... on the list of tattoos i have gotten let me see that list noooo tattoos 1. bear 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. freddy, i hope i'm not too late. don't get that bear tattoo... for bears are now extinct! okay. oh no i already got it! later welcome to the extinct animal haters club!

232 SOAP soapfoot rghghgh respect your neighbors rghghgh follow your heart meanwhile man this mud sure is dirty don't you mean mud this man sure is dirty ??? seconds later soapfoot i don't know what you've done, but this is the cleanest mud puddle i've ever seen rarghgghh i am just an animal rghgghgh pay me no mind as i foolishly follow my natural instincts but soapfoot don't cry, human. did i get soap in your eye? no... you got soap in my heart.

231 GOLF fore! that is incorrect. you lose the math tournament aww man i knew i shouldn't have been golfing during the math tournament this is like the time i was throwing away all my trash at the cooking tournament previously i guess getting a little mixed up is what i'm all about later aww man i cut my t.v. in half. now which half is "t" and which half is "v"? later aww man i gave myself dog food and cooked my dog a steak dinner well billroy, i think you definately need to work on these confusion issues but what would i know, i'm not a therapist! mixed up again??

230 OXYGEN MAN oxygen man oxygen and the adventures of not getting breathed in hmm time for a nice breath of fresh air. time to breathe that air in deep hmm???? quick oxygen man, into this balloon. he can't breathe you in there later happy birthday sam oxygen

229 PLUTTO okay ronny, there are fifteen planets in the solar system, assuming you count pluto as seven planets and you do but grampa olderly my scientist/teacher/astronomer said that pluto isn't a planet well where is that fancy teacher i'll beat the anti-planeting right out of him fragile oh my gosh oh my gosh later everyone agrees the only reason i said that pluto isn't a planet is because it's actually seven planets can i be an astronomer too?


227 BEARS changing into a bear has been one of the best times of my life bobo bear, but i've got to go back to my job at the bear rug factory bobo bear doesn't want you to go! bobo bear will miss you! here bobo bear, i got you a present. it's called a gun. can you say gun? guh guh guh goo goo gun later watch out guys, it's a bear. we've got to play dead so it won't attack us bang bang bang

226 SALE store one percent off sale!!! finally a use for my ninety-nine dollar bill later hello sir, i would like your finest set of one hundred hamburgers well as you can see we have a collection of hamburgers. an interesting trivia fact is there are one hundred hamburgers hamburgers are suspected to be made from cows seconds before the cow would have become invincible. as you can imagine, this set is suspected to include many hamburgers, perhaps even a hundred i've got the money right here just put some glue on it and put it on my belly 5 5 5 5 1 1 1 1 20 20 10 10 5 5

225 LETTERS greetings, gary my name is bar! and not every word starts with the letter g! gary gou're gotally grazy later on planet alphabet so i'm looking to find the letter g so i can stop my friend from using him so much oh

224 CENTAUR my search for the mythical centaur has drawn me to anger actually a better word would be madness thesaurus boy you're starting to get a little annoying you mean irritating right. that can mean annoying. it's practically the same definition so i hear someone "cent" for a centaur? that was my only joke!

223 FOREST merging with this tree has been a great success it has really caused me to bark it up? to branch things? bad puns hey brian, this is jennifer. jennifer jennillius from math class hey jennifer anyways brian, sorry but we have to cut you down to make cool math figurines like these fun/fun=1 fun divided by fun equals one math is (square root/radical symbol) math is square root

222 TAT-DO OR TAT-DON'T this temporary tattoo has made me permanently cool at least for now hey gary's tattoo. wanna go on a date with this marker i got on my arm get a job, girl. i've got plans with think quick gary, you've got to finish your sentence ...a swampy character? to get sweaty? but swampman said he'd hang out with me later! he's my friend! my schedule is swamped

221 UNTITLED glueing these birds to your arms has been great, but i've grown to hate you aww man flap flap flap excuse me sir, but have you ever had anyone hate you what are you pointing at well when i was a little boy, i bought everyone kittens to make sure they wouldn't hate me. later but i'm not a pet shop owner i'm a taxidermist $$$

220 NEW SHIRT hmm i'm not too sure about this carpet shirt the salesman assured me it was from a real carpet beast's hide hey where's the couch up in this house this isn't the floor of a house it's just my shirt a man in the floor? this is no way to conduct business. i hope he doesn't find out about my couch bracelet

219 MAGIC hey man what's up sorcery sunday oh really what kind of spells are you casting oh well i just cast a spell that will make you believe that your t.v. is broken aww man, my t.v.! the spell is working

218 SOUPY SOUP hmm this old man soup has a bit too much salt hey ray this is ray no i'm not your future self i just have the same first name as you remember anyways what do you do if you put too much salt in something are you just stuck i've got to throw away my salt so i don't end up like my future self

217 SPACE VACATION all aboard the space express! welcome to the space express trains are so boring next stop: mars! i'm gonna go take a nap later welcome to the space express jim, we just left mars! how could you be sleeping? yaaawn yaaawn the galactic monarchy had a battle right near where we landed! welcome to the space express well i hope they were fighting about me getting something to eat because i am hungry actually they were charge! for jim's stomach! eat the hamburger men! dang. i told you guys we should have been super-intelligent mushrooms instead at least then we'd freak them out

216 LASER DAY 2007: TREE SHIRT hey tree i like your laser shirt. thanks, i got it at sarah's laser store. have a good one later welcome to my laser store. i will make whatever you want with my magic powers. this is my only employee, interrupting volcano oh well then i booga booga booga

215 LASER DAY 2007: ALLY CASTLE here comes the laser castle! everybody move! bam everyone it is me, your laser queen ally. and this is my laser biship, chitters 100. i can only move diagonally everyone is invited to the laser ball later confused bear why are you on the laser ball oh i thought this was a planet i've been living here for two months

214 LASER DAY 2007: FUNKY MAN CAKE the laser cake is almost ready! i promise i won't bake you into a cake. i won't bake you in, funky man. i am not gonna bake you into the laser cake. later aww dang my piece of cake has a man in it mine has a boat funky man sails away on the cake maybe i should just live on this boat forever no one would care a cake whale gives funky man a little advice. months later, at the zoo. cake what?? rhino shhhh

213 1 DAY BEFORE LASER DAY 1 day until laser day james is on his way to laser town. suddenly he takes a right turn... into the desert. desperate for food and a cactus hunt, james is ambushed by a saguaro. james waits 120 years for the saguaro to die, then heads back towards the road.

212 3 DAYS BEFORE LASER DAY 3 days before laser day harry is setting up his laser day concession stand. when he cooks a hot dog and it gets burnt, he says "they should have called you a 'too hot' dog." everyone hears harry's joke and thinks he is putting on a comedy show. nobody buys anything from harry because they have stage fright.

211 7 DAYS BEFORE LASER DAY 7 days before laser day john was painting his house laser blue, but his hand got stuck in his house. later, inside the house, kids dressed his hand up as a businessman. john's hand has an important business call to make.

210 WORDS rambunctious is the word of the day for me hey harry, feeling a little rambunct? i am. who are you you can't shorten rambunctious to "rambunct". it doesn't make any sense shut up, doctor grammar. you shot my best friend "AND BOT". previously andi just wanted to start a sentence an

209 CHAIRS CHAIRS all aboard the chair train! wait a sec, i'm having too much fun okay go look! a table helicopter is here to join in on the adventure! physics! gravity! hee hee hee hee hee hee hee hee later

208 A DINOSAUR go away pterodactyl. i'm just a simple sandwich eating man rrnraawww i've just come to tell you about the best sandwich eating store in the universe... in the world! later hmm that was the best sandwich i've ever had. but will i ever see that pterodactyl again? excuse me sir, but you have seen any pterodactyls around? what? pterodactyls have been extinct for millions of year. hmm, maybe there really is such a thing as dinosaur magic

207 CONFUSED BEAR EATS SOMEBODY you guys better watch out i just ate your friend. i am ferocious no i saw you confused bear you just ate a street sign aww man i knew that sign was trying to tell me something stop i am just a sign

206 UNTITLED finally i'm out from under that mattress. i never want to see another mattress again. aww no a bear i'm hungry or mad oh wait it's confused bear here i come confused bear is so confused why is a mattress in the forest

205 A 'LITTLE' PROBLEM hey little guy how's it going aww what the heck why am i so small this is crazy you've got to call the police hello police? this is jerry. i've got a little friend that needs a lot of help later hey little guy, looks like the mice police have finally arrived and the cockroach scientists aren't far behind, working on a cure

204 WALKING hmm walking is tough, i'm just gonna stay here hey jim, want to go to the fair with us sorry ladies, no more walking for me i'll wait 'til they build a fair around me and then maybe i'll look at it there must be some way we can get jim to go later you're not tall enough to ride crawl crawl crawl crawl crawl crawl


202 BEARD hey get away from my beard rub rub rub rub but your beard is so big where will i go i don't care later on an adventure to get away from a guy's beard excuse me sir do you have any food mustache

201 EVERYBODY MAN IS A ROLEMODEL look it's everybody man! everybody wants to be like everybody man! blghgh blgh hey everybody, everybody man is throwing up am i cool too

200 INVENTION. hey james check out my new invention an amplified spoon slush sloosh cereal click crunch chomp do you like my invention whisper whisper

199 SHOES be right back i want to go to the bathroom hey don't step on my shoes oops ahhhhhhh take them off they're not your shoes oh no i can't get them off because i like them too much thanks for the compliment but compliments don't take your shoes off what a world it would be if they did hey anne i like your hair

198 HORSE JOKES this is gonna be so great go go amy let me in amy oh hey dave what's

197 A CAKE FOR POWER THRILLS hey power thrills do you want some cake is it honorable? an honorable cake? no dishonor then i will only have one piece, along with a side of unjustified ice cream. later this is no occasion for ice cream!

196 SANDWICHECHECH mmm i love sandwiches don't eat me hey who are you my name is bologna and wait bologna i've eaten you before. are you trying to trick me this time? no that's also the name of a meat but my name is i can't wait to show fred this potato chip that looks like a dinosaur hey man check out this little person in my sandwich

195 TALL AND SMART tall guy comin through i went to college for being tall don't you believe the truth i went to college for being annoying i minored in being easily embarassed

194 GUNBOT IS FASHIONABLE hey gunbot i like your shirt gunbot doesn't wear shirts. free apples! but gunbot you're wearing a shirt that says 'free apples'! if gunbot sold apples they would cost twice as much, and instead of apples they would be your enemies disguised as apples. but gunbot butt gunbot?? later

193 BANANANANANANAS hey who nailed this banana to the wall chomp chomp chomp chomp chomp oh hey there jim are you taking a look at my brghghghghghghghghghghghghghghhghghghghghgghghghghghghghgghghghghgh.

192 HAMMERING man with the hammering hands, we need your help once again it is a matter of construction you don't know what my life is like! every day it's hammer this. nail that. nail these hammers together. "if you nail these hammers together i will be able to hammer two nails at once." "assuming they are very close to each other." "nails can be far apart, or they can be close together. it's science." meanwhile

191 NOT QUITE A CUP AND NOT QUITE A CUPCAKE hey benny have you seen my muffin oh my gosh oh noooo meanwhile oh man what a good day for muffin eagle man what does that muffin think its gonna do maybe

189 SOUPPPPPPP waiter, there's a planet in my soup aww maaan chomp chomp chomp guys someone is eating the planet! everyone get in the boat pschooom waiter, my soup planet's boat is getting away

188 BOXES DON'T DO ANYTHING aww man, boxes are boring surprise dinosaur yes. yes. this is what i want surprise dinosaur could be your friend but only if you like big surprises

187 ABOZZI #23 oops i dropped my hat haha now the floor is wearing a hat let's get the floor a suit and bring it with us to parties

186 ABOZZI #22 hey james what book are you reading a real one how to pretend to read a book

185 ABOZZI #21 james will be so scared when i jump out from behind this tree later ahh it's a tree

184 HEAD IS A DINOSAUR IS HUNGRY i'm gonna eat the whole world that is the current business of head is a dinosaur chomp chomp dang this world is hard to eat oh sweet here it goes chomp chomp later aww man my bicycle was on that

183 GUNBOT DOES IT gunbot, you're my hero! i even have a little gunbot doll get away from gunbot. gunbot is closer than gunbot appears. haha, gunbot i love your jokes doctor gunbot diagnoses you with being annoying. the prescription is bullets. haha look my blood is trying to get away from the bullet. nice try

182 NEW HATS hey fred i like your new hat thanks it is okay but there is some other guy in it well you know what they say, "sometimes there are other people in your bit hat" yeah that is a pretty old saying i think it might go back to the 1980's or so meanwhile in the 1980s

181 ALLY HAS GOOD IDEAS hey funky man, i just had the greatest idea what eating your own hands. what a great idea come on funky man, let's try to eat our own hands dang funky man, i don't think i am strong enough to do it you'll have to tell me what eating your own hands is like okay just a sec just give me a minute to eat my own hands

180 BENNY BENNY hey ms. marzo benny did you remember to get my potato chips from the candy machine oh sorry if i forgot so benny did you forget to get them probably yeah probably benny i should just eat you as potato chips how much would you like that i'm too shy to get eaten as potato chips heh heh oh my gosh

179 HARD GAMES yesssss i captured the flag james this isn't how you play golf hey that guy has the flag he's the king of the golf course every king deserves a crown i can't ever move again or this is gonna fall off aww man the ball fell into that hole what the heck

178 GIRAFFE hey david how much do you like my pet giraffe i give it an a out of 10 rating well hey did you know that giraffes have blue tongues everybody knows that everybody knows giraffes have blue tongues

177 HORSES ARE FUN brian brian look i'm a horse oh congratulat wait you're not a horse you're just riding a horse okay now here i go hahahaha oh snap

176 JANNETTO MARZO'S CLASS ms. marzo, what is your favorite animal? my favorite animal is dead giraffes what is your favorite animal peter i like dogs peter did you know that dogs are not smart enough to technically be alive what does "technically" mean "technically" is a word that means all dogs are dead my dog isn't dead he is great peter can your dog talk or do math or tell me a story he can tell you a story about barking

175 UNTITLED sweet, a wall my wall hunt is finally over time to move in for the kill no hey what are you doing there no one is allowed on that side of the wall well uh actually there is a lot of stuff on the other side of your wall aww man i thought there wasn't

174 ALLY HELPS CHITTERS 100 chitters 100 you need to get people to respect your actions oh really ally are you sure yes chitters and i have the number one idea to do this later this mouse is on a stilt wow probably the tallest mouse everyone be sincere towards this mouse. he is strict and will not do business with you. can i take a picture the answer to all questions asked when chitters is nearby is a definite no. haha can i not take a picture then hey no tricky questions ahh! he talked to me! oh sorry

173 SANDWICH gonna kiss a sandwich, huh oh uh hey no i was just going to eat it yeah right, why don't you kiss your sandwich girlfriend chomp chomp

172 FUNKY MAN GOES ON A VISIT funky man what are you doing here?? oh sorry sarah i thought you invited me over it must have been a dream hahahahaha just kidding funky man thanks for helping me make a joke sorry come in and let's play video games i'm tired of not playing video games later uh oh, i think i'm going to win

171 HORSE time to take a trip to the horse rollercoaster surprise later

170 HUNGRYUNGRY i'm not hungry. i'm not hungry at all! if i ate anything else i'd probably get a really bad stomache ache meanwhile hamburger sniper ready for action

169 SOME DINOSAURS go dinosaurs let's go bfffffff hey jim hey my dinosaurs are going to eat your dinosaurs oh snap guys here comes an asteroid to destroy all the dinosaurs dang man what are you doing on an asteroid i don't know man i don't know it sucks

168 RESTAURANT yes sir welcome to the sea food restaurant what would you like to order i would like to order a wet sandwich hmm i see, we just got a fresh batch of wet sandwiches from the sandwich fisherman sandwich fisherman! you're so brave!

167 GRAPE JUICE JUICE this isn't grape juice it's just grapes tom can't hear the word juice, it's his one weakness hmm how can i use that against him to take over his castle tom does not live in a castle my weakness is that i think everyone lives in a castle do you live in a castle no i do not liar

166 SEAFOOD swimming swimming swimming... is pretty great ahhhhhhhhhhh it's a peanut butter and jellyfish ahhhhhhhhhh meanwhile dang man i just dropped my sandwich into the entire ocean wet sandwich

165 GREAT PLATE HEYY science monster what is the latest invention dr. box, it is a plate oh that is such a good idea a plate that is also a cookie haha, that is great. "hey... who ate my plate."

164 JELLYFISH! hey peter i heard your new car looks like a jellyfish who told you that?? jack did later hey jack why did you say that about my car oh hey peter long time no see i see you are a giant jellyfish now i like your jellyfish pants

163 GRAVITY GOT ME aww dang where did my gravity go hey james... looking for this? hey give me back my gravity! with all this gravity i weigh so much i can finally be an elephant

162 NEW HAT hey do you like my new heart hat gross. it's not a real heart, it's fluffy and made of cottom meanwhile

161 HALF MOON hey man this is dave and i think half the moon is gone what should i do man you destroyed the moon? yeah i guess so dang well i would say to move to another country but that will not get you any farther from the moon i guess the farthest you could get is if you lived at the bottom of the ocean jim why are you always trying to get me to live under the ocean

160 REMEMBER TO FIGHT ALIENS okay then alien blob what would you say to a bullet bang bang bang gunboy you idiot you just shot the planet ahh dang shut up sally gunboy shooting the planet is like the opposite of recycling

159 TIME TO HAVE AN IDEA oh man i have the best idea ever... ever! what is it cupt hats for kiiiiiids later check it out

158 ZEBRAS hey... i'd like to get a zebra sorry sir the zoo does not sell animals seeeriously? dang man can you believe the zoo does not sell animals what are the odds of that well james you cannot have this cake until you give me an animal that starts with z (james then leans over to take a look at the cake which is hilarious)

157 FEELING CLASSY ABOUT IT daaang man i am feeling classy two monocles is actually three times better than one daaang man you are looking classy with two monocles i can see two things at once does it make everything look classy does it make everything look classy

156 SPORTS, SPORTS do you have any sports heroes? astronauts... astronauting isn't a sport yeah instead of basketballs they have planets man basketball is hard hey guys i discovered life on basketball dang man that is worth 3 points

155 JANNETTO MARZO SEEMS VERY TALL david i thought we were friends but you did not tell me about your new hat sorry jannetto it is my fault it could not have been anyone else's fault david why did you say such a dumb thing sorry i will tell you next hat david that is okay but now i am falling down oh no david i hope you are feeling very sad i am very sad david i will get up someday i hope you will not worry about it too much why don't you get up now david i feel good when i am on the floor because i cannot fall down wow what a thing to say david it is not a metaphor you should not think about it too much

154 JOKE JOKE JOKE hey laughbot, tell us another joke what is the difference between a rabbit and a bear what rabbit is not a bear

153 MOVIES FOR MOVIES have you see any good movies lately no, let's make one. later okay this movie is about princess orange and her orange tree oh orange tree, why do you oranges grow blue for a princess like me dave have you been painting the oranges blue no jim i'm not in the scene it looks like you're talking to the camera have you been painting my oranges blue

152 LASER DAY 2006: TREE AND SARAH ON LASER DAY hahahahahahahahahaha jump jump jump whoa you kids need to be careful just because it is laser day does not mean you can jump off houses help i'm stuck in a tree i am not a tree zzz hey trees can't talk be quiet here i'm just going to put you guys back in your house hey kids are falling into my house hahahahaha that is so crazy do you kids want to play video games hey sarah hey sarah can i play some video games nevermind ugh ugh

151 LASER DAY 2006: HEAD IS A DINOSAUR AND GUNBOY AND SALLY ON LASER DAY happy dinosaur, head is a laser day! i mean i. am. going. to. eat. everybody. graaaar head is a dinosaur is on a head is a rampage suddenly bop gunboy you idiot you don't throw guns, you shoot them okay sure sally whatever you say just kidding. here hold my jacket while i get eaten by head is a dinosaur and shoot my way out gunboy you're not even wearing a jacket oh yeah that's right it got shot off while i was defending gun city from an alien invasion didn't it hmm i should feed him a dynamite sandwich gunboy who would eat a dynamite sandwich maybe you should think of a good plan hey sally maybe we should feed you to head is a dinosaur so he will die from your poisonous temper haha oh snap

150 LASER DAY 2006: GUNBOT ON LASER DAY hey gunbot what do you think about laser day lasers are for girls gunbot only shoots bullets, and enemies. then why did you come to laser town to shoot at lasers ahh my hat! bang bang bang take that laser hat once more gunbot kills another hat again high five.

149 LASER DAY 2006: ALLY'S LASER DAY PARTY man my laser day party is so great agreed. hey all where is your bathroom funky man how did you know i was having a laser day party zap laser zap i'm here for a laser day party power thrills you are just in time for the dance song "do the calculate" there is no time for dancing. there is plenty of time for justice/retribution power thrills parties are for dancing you told me this was a justice/retribution party hahahahaha it's true ally i sentence you to laser lightning hey ally where are all the cookies at laser lightning

148 LASER DAY 2006: IT'S LASER DAY guys i can't believe it's laser day ahhhhhhh laser hats, get your laser hats here i'll take a laser's dozen later i love laser day

147 WHAT IS BRINGING YOU you know what is bringing me down gravity is bringing me down gravity weighs more than anything hmm even more than a 1000 pound cake? a 1000 pound cake??

146 A GREAT PLAN okay so sarah when i say "time to teleport" that's when you know it is time to teleport me away with your magic powers later uhh excuse me sir did you know funky man is dumb time to teleport

145 ALLY AND SARAH chocolate chip chip chip man sarah is such a showoff with her magic powers i guess these loaf of bread shoes are like my new magic power hey all those bread shoes are nice nice nice i think they would be good for giving soft wheaty kicks

144 WHEN ANIMALS ATTACK EACH OTHER AT THE SAME TIME who do you think would win a fight between a lion and a crocodile hmm i think the teleporting elephant would teleport in of course that's just what the teleporting elephant does

143 BEST FRIENDS ARE BEST FRIENDS my best friend is one hundred elephants hey do you guys want to play football against me and my friend 100 elephants yeah later football is hard

142 COOKIES FOR YOU? uh oh looks like i ate the whole bowl of cookies james is gonna be so mad hey what is going on here nothing... i'm a bunch of cookies hehe me too chocolate chip

141 BEVERAGES BEVERAGES the beverage needs more sugar sugar sugar yes hey i want to try flour oh nooo bread

140 SMALLER FRIENDS aww i love you little guys john as your galumpagump friends we'd like to give you a galumpagump hug hug hug hug now you have to eat us aww but you're my only little galumpagump friends but we're galumpalicious well i guess i can make a galumpagump pie time to grind some galumpagumps all the guts are falling out

139 ALLY IS MEAN TO FUNKY MAN here funky man, eat this peanut butter sandwich okay chomp chomp chew quick funky man! say bumblebee or you're in big trouble! brlglgghphh brrrrrlgggff hahahahaha

138 ANYTHING HAPPENS ON SUPER MARS everything is a little weird on super mars weird things my hat keeps getting smaller and smaller it's like the size of a little snack. make a little hamburger and when did i start wearing pink laser shoes? they're beautiful hey lady... did you hear about my pink laser shoes? yes, there was an article about them in the daily paper every day hmm... pink laser shoes: big news on super mars? you're a pretty big celebrity i guess. did you see your movie nope. pretty good? well it's call "boy in the pink laser shoes." basically you constantly walk around backwards thinking you're going back in time haha, they made a movie about that? and i wasn't going back in time? how am i gonna get off super mars if i can't go back in time hey do you have a rocket ship that rockets in whatever direction it is going, but also back in time? yeah but it's really small. i don't know why it's so small heh what a cute little rocket ship

137 GUNBOT IS THE GUY gunbot are you ready for action gunbot is ready for action, fraction, addition, and subtraction let's go bzzzz bzzzz gunbot is always bored right now. let's fight enemies there aren't any enemies gunbot hmm... maybe that flower is an enemy? gunbot is the guy who kills flowers bang bang bang bang bang dang you... gunbot

136 BEACH PARTY a beach party! i love to go to a beach party! hey man hey what's up well as you can see i got stuck in a beach ball again

135 NICE MONEY how many coolpennies do you think what how many coolpennies do you think it would take to buy a new hat one coolpenny, two coolpenny, threecoolpennies, four five six seven eight eight coolpennies hmm i don't have any coolpennies are you coolpenny serious coolpenny yes. do you have any coolpenny work for me to do? hmm... i guess you could be the commander of my army oh really yes... i'll call you commander thrilliams okay what do i do? yes sir... commander! yes sir

134 UNTITLED hey what's up alex argh i had to swim through space from mars why?? i didn't have enough spaceships heh, why don't you come in and have a surprise cake okay surprise whoa what is going on it's a surprise party it's a surprise because there's no reason to throw a party it could be my coming home party okay everybody this is gonna be alex's going away party no i said coming home party sorry alex, i already said it's a going away party looks like you have to swim back to mars

133 MAGIC IS IMPORTANT i am a powerful sorcerer and this oscillating fan is my stave i summon the power of wind jenny i will blow you away peter why are you such a weirdo imagination superstation transformation poof i have transformed into a traitorous leopard a traitorous leopard? don't worry jenny... i'm on your side heheheh

132 THAT IS NOT WHERE THEY GO hey who filled my cup with little dogs do little dogs know gulp gulp

131 GUNBOT IS A RASCAL gunbot ate my arms shrug gunbot, i told you not to eat anyone else's arms i shot them off and i ate them gunbot people need to point at things with their arms dangit gunbot i needed that i've got to go over here

130 FOOD i'm gonna eat you

129 HATS heh heh what would you think about cooler hats cooler hats would be cooler hats on me. i would wear all the cooler hats hey i want to wear cooler hats too shake shake

128 GUNBOT okay gunbot you've gotta calm down gunbot isn't ever gonna calm down gunbot is a trooper gunbot here will a bullet sandwich calm you down that would be delicious bang bang bang bang gunbot you shot the bullet sandwich there are too many bullets in that sandwich now

127 BANANAS bananabear is attacking! grr banana grr banana hello everybody give me several bananas please you already ate all the bananas, bananabear! there what no bananas?

126 ARMS what would i do if i had 10 arms hehehehe hey little boy would you like 10 oranges yes yes

125 UNTITLED hahahahahahahahaha this cup is gigantic hey what's up with the cup tom it's a pretty big cup isn't it man yes the weatherman said it's going to rain grape juice today i don't believe it believe it or leave it i'll stay

124 GALUMPAGUMP PIE would you like some galumpagump pie yes. galumpagumps are the thing that you congratulate yourself if you eat it later good job well done my friend, well done i like watching people eat pie

123 VIDEO GAMES video games are my favorite video games hey charles are you a dog that would like to play video games chew chew chew hey charles that's not how you play video games how do i play video games


121 A DELICIOUS TREAT AND YOU CONGRATULATE YOURSELF IF YOU EAT IT hey guys hey what's up man who ate all my galumpagumps

120 THE SUN ahh i see the sun is out today today would be a good day to put on some sunglasses there we go another pair is twice the fun ten pairs of sunglasses is twice the fun

119 FLYING i hope this bird doesn't notice me i've got to get this juice to town as fast as i can

118 HORSEEYE i've got a horse stuck in my eye! can't quite make it out how the heck can a horse fit in your eye my eyes must be... gigantic with eyes this big, i can see everything. i think i see something right now

117 FLOAT FAR REMOTE: PART 11/11 float far remote part 11/11 a house just landed in the forest! yeah right i'm serious!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! later we are astronauts from planet jupiter we've come to fight the earth i am timtron, commander general of jupiter army i don't want to hurt anyone! i'm just a little space mouse

116 FLOAT FAR REMOTE: PART 10/11 float far remote part 10/11 house parachute: activate wow miss ally i can see everything i can see my house from here we're in your house! that was a joke! it was a good joke

115 FLOAT FAR REMOTE: PART 9/11 float far remote part 9/11 ocean waterfall we're going over a waterfall! everyone for themselves kick no no no chitters chitters 100 go away go away

114 FLOAT FAR REMOTE: PART 8/11 float far remote part 8/11 i can't believe i defeated that monster! hey ally it was chitters who beat the monster if i win a fight against a monster, will i turn into a monster? ally i really don't think that would happen yes it could!

113 FLOAT FAR REMOTE: PART 7/11 float far remote part 7/11 stupid dang monster, i'm gonna fight you haha, yeah right i'm gonna fight a rotten monster me? i'm gonna fight a dang monster not if... classy monster... classy monster floats away hey what are you doing classy monster floats so far away! can you reach him chitters go go go go foooooooooooo bam my hat! you can't be classy without a classy hat hey guess what classy monster what what you are not very classy that's what i heard ally can you throw me up there too once you throw me up there i could probably fly around without fallying i'm gonna throw you noooooo noooo not that tim honestly i knew that would happen when i tried throwing you

112 FLOAT FAR REMOTE: PART 6/11 float far remote part 6/11 hey what is a house doing here what was that?? graar i am hungry... for houses? hey maybe i'll eat you instead yeah right, maybe i'll eat you first though stupid monster, my mouse chitters could fight you in one hit yeah right, a mouse would have to be the seriously best mouse to fight me in one hit that's you chitters! you're the best mouse could i fight a monster?

111 FLOAT FAR REMOTE: PART 5/11 float far remote part 5/11 my name is tim and this is chitters 100 (the best mouse) my namy is ally surprise news: we're floating away i already knew that miss ally are we going to find land again or will we live on the ocean forever hey don't worry little guy everything will be okay just kidding

110 FLOAT FAR REMOTE: PART 4/11 float far remote part 4/11 hey is anyone in there is there anybody in a house is there anyone around here that happens to be in a house hey who the heck is yelling out there i'm sorry it was this mouse i'm sorry hey you guys are in an ocean that is pretty cool

109 FLOAT FAR REMOTE: PART 3/11 float far remote part 3/11 ahoy chitters 100, pirate tim reporting for duty what??? what??? ahoy avast, enemy ship on the starboard! starboard "board game of the galaxy" you're so good at starboard, chitters your star unicorn strategy is amazing i got the idea from liking unicorns and i just went from there thank you

108 FLOAT FAR REMOTE: PART 2/11 float far remote part2/11 that night morning tim, wake up! something is happening what, what tim, there is water everywhere! what happened chitters?? i don't know it is probably my fault if you are mad at me i can jump off and float away

107 FLOAT FAR REMOTE: PART 1/11 float far remote part 1/11 who is the best mouse you are the best mouse, chitters one-hundred chitters 100 is the best mouse of all okay chitters 100, it's time for bed am i really the best mouse?

106 ON A BOX help, david daniel, what are you doing i say on this box to read a book, and when i looked back up the box had grown 30 feet tall! sometimes boxes get taller, daniel. sometimes you have to ride a box into the clouds. but david i just want to sit on the ground and read about science sometimes you have to dream daniel. sometimes science isn't enouuuuuugh good luck on your adventure

105 SLIDE MOUNTAIN time to slide down "slide mountain" whoooaa whooaa! hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha heheheheheheheheheheheheheheheheh high five

104 GRAPE SODA so, you finally betrayed me what i asked for a grape soda, but you got me an orange soda oh, sorry... grape sodas are the only thing i'm not allergic to i guess that's why i drink grape sodas so much

103 FAR FUTURE the far future is pretty neat i guess! jetpack store so you see, jetpacks are powered by soda hey, can i buy some jetpack fuel you have to wait in line but i'm from the past really i've come to warn you about a horrible event that occured 300 years ago ahh yes, the great hat shortage how did you already know?? everybody knows about that does everybody know how to get me some jetpack fuel yes cherry jetpack fuel so this is soda right yeah this is gonna be delicious jetpack

102 DINOSAUR LAND how could i have known that teleporter would send me to dinosaur land! ahhh! aaahh!! dinosaur king! what there are dinosaurs everywhere!

101 MY CEREAL who ate all my cereal?? was it you again?

100 WALLS i wish i could walk through walls i wish i wish bump bump dave, are you trying to walk through walls again leave me alone, amy! you'll never understand me! you'll never walk through walls dave! never ever! i wish! i wish!


98 TWO SODAS hmm two cups of soda for one guy me... spill glup argh this is too messy who ever said that two sodas were better than one... i did and i still say two sodas are ever better than one... that's stupid. how would you like it. you'll get what you deserve gulp gulp gulp




































62 BIG



















43 The Wall




39 SKY